I have always loved the rain. Haven't I? The world is beautiful when it rains. I composed a love letter three days ago because of the rain. And now suddenly the chills are here and the skin is remembering things I thought long forgiven and forgotten.
I don't know. I want to think it isn't because of any of them. I have been strange lately, though, haven't I? Everybody remarked. Perhaps monsoon keys me up.
I'd rather not be keyed up. I can't seem to think of anything right now. My mind is wandering in the streets of last year in meetings real and imaginary; by lights of sun and moon and stars. She refuses to let go. Why, though? Why does she? I was fixed. I saw me fixed.
Random thought: Maybe there are chemical imbalances or something! So what should I be doing?
Maybe soup?
I will make soup!
Okay let's see what that does. I will be mopey no more. I would appreciate more free kisses, but I will not pine!
P.S. Just look at last May's posts. Just LOOK at them! Could you get ANY MORE PATHETIC.
It has to be the weather. It just does. I mean. Seasonal mood changes are not that strange, are they? All the self-doubt etcetera etcetera. Hmmmm. I wish I had a better record of earlier years. Also! I fear I am about to get very very needy. Well, whatever. Not like I haven't driven people away before.
Another thought! May was usually spent in hotter climes when young. True or false? Perhaps it has something to do with it? Also! March poems and moans and stupid phone calls. I fear I might be on to something here.
Oh, whatever. All these theories get me no closer to design.
adwise: Stop waiting, he isn't going to show up any time till tomorrow.
Also, stop fighting with the mother. DO YOU HEAR ME. You just leave her alone.
I don't know. I want to think it isn't because of any of them. I have been strange lately, though, haven't I? Everybody remarked. Perhaps monsoon keys me up.
I'd rather not be keyed up. I can't seem to think of anything right now. My mind is wandering in the streets of last year in meetings real and imaginary; by lights of sun and moon and stars. She refuses to let go. Why, though? Why does she? I was fixed. I saw me fixed.
Random thought: Maybe there are chemical imbalances or something! So what should I be doing?
Maybe soup?
I will make soup!
Okay let's see what that does. I will be mopey no more. I would appreciate more free kisses, but I will not pine!
P.S. Just look at last May's posts. Just LOOK at them! Could you get ANY MORE PATHETIC.
It has to be the weather. It just does. I mean. Seasonal mood changes are not that strange, are they? All the self-doubt etcetera etcetera. Hmmmm. I wish I had a better record of earlier years. Also! I fear I am about to get very very needy. Well, whatever. Not like I haven't driven people away before.
Another thought! May was usually spent in hotter climes when young. True or false? Perhaps it has something to do with it? Also! March poems and moans and stupid phone calls. I fear I might be on to something here.
Oh, whatever. All these theories get me no closer to design.
adwise: Stop waiting, he isn't going to show up any time till tomorrow.
Also, stop fighting with the mother. DO YOU HEAR ME. You just leave her alone.
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