meh. I'm tired of waiting for blogger beta.
for once, i am confident i can finish a substantial chunk of work. it feels good.
in other news, old twinges still surprise me. how long is it going to last? i was thinking. how strange it is that i always end up thinking about certain people whenever i start thinking at all? it isn't voluntary, i don't think. it just seems to happen, an uncontrollable little chain reaction that runs quietly from random thought to person a, to person b and then c and d and all the others in a strangely intricate mental map.
i wanted to make a list.
crossword, coffee, beaches, blog, blog, blog, blog, snob, sellar, digger, rainman, misfit, misfit, toothache. i'm missing too many. are the associations so poor? i will take the risk, then, and name them. doc, vishwa, vin, pa, ma, fu, prof, san, monk, dre, the singhs, the ding, id, sapru, ug, duende. half these people i've not seen in real life. the order is all jumbled up in my head. as are my feelings for all of them. strangely, about the girls as much as the guys. new friends. new friends rearrange perspectives.
i wonder how much of these people i have extrapolated from my own wishes to have them just so, and the need to fit them in my neat little labelled jars. they all make me smile, though, i'll grant that. just for that, the extrapolation should be worth it, surely?
hmmm. the buzz is gone again. not right that i should grant a person that power.
someone's been here who shouldn't. i wonder about that, too.
for once, i am confident i can finish a substantial chunk of work. it feels good.
in other news, old twinges still surprise me. how long is it going to last? i was thinking. how strange it is that i always end up thinking about certain people whenever i start thinking at all? it isn't voluntary, i don't think. it just seems to happen, an uncontrollable little chain reaction that runs quietly from random thought to person a, to person b and then c and d and all the others in a strangely intricate mental map.
i wanted to make a list.
crossword, coffee, beaches, blog, blog, blog, blog, snob, sellar, digger, rainman, misfit, misfit, toothache. i'm missing too many. are the associations so poor? i will take the risk, then, and name them. doc, vishwa, vin, pa, ma, fu, prof, san, monk, dre, the singhs, the ding, id, sapru, ug, duende. half these people i've not seen in real life. the order is all jumbled up in my head. as are my feelings for all of them. strangely, about the girls as much as the guys. new friends. new friends rearrange perspectives.
i wonder how much of these people i have extrapolated from my own wishes to have them just so, and the need to fit them in my neat little labelled jars. they all make me smile, though, i'll grant that. just for that, the extrapolation should be worth it, surely?
hmmm. the buzz is gone again. not right that i should grant a person that power.
someone's been here who shouldn't. i wonder about that, too.
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